Hey Link-loves-BTR, I'm sorry that it took me so long to get back to you after the prompt. I've been thinking of you all week. It's just being so busy I have to hold out for the weekend until I can get around to my writing obligations. Any-who, I'm here now and I'm just going to look at some little basic things today. Nothing too out of the ordinary or fancy. Ideas, ideas and ideas galore. Once again, I'm really sorry for that monstrosity of a delay.

Pros

• You have a good flow. There is no jarring stops as you are following a very straight forward rhyme scheme.

• The story is great. It's suspenseful and leaves the reader with so many questions on where this darling's parents have gone. You have made this character like a little girl without really telling the reader. With poetry being in such few words, it's something impressive if you can develop a character that fast.

• The line, “same answer,” whether you think so or now was very dramatic. Where you could have repeated the first half of the second line, you decided to come to a more solid approach to the writer. It's the point in the poem where you really grasp the situation and in turn, shiver yourself at where the parents could have gone. Aliens perhaps?

Suggestions

• Now, as this section is called suggestions, I'm going to put this out there as something you could develop in your writing. As good as your rhyme scheme was, I found what really stood out to me that you were using very flat and typical words. It felt like you were putting together, “the cat sat on the mat” schemes. Which in turn is not a bad thing in something as free as poetry, but I think one thing I suggest is you look past your mental dictionary.

What I mean by this is, I think what you should do is go websites and places like: www.rhymezone.com/ You could both enhance your vocabulary, but you can also give a much more dramatic appearance of your poems with more complex words and twisting and crippling structures. When I write poetry, this is something very important to me. These five and ten dollars words can sometimes give it that extra boost.

Think of it this way: You want to make the reader feel smart; A poem that is too simple sometimes takes away the tone.

Alas, this might not be the kind of thing for you; I ask of you to at least think of it. Maybe you can come across something you like. Maybe a re-occurring word in a rhyme or maybe even a new mental prompt idea will form from it.

I hope you consider in joining the contest for soon. It would be a pleasure—as it always is—to have you on board.

Naktarra